Monday, July 15, 2013

Cooking with shortKort

In honor of my 2 baby cousins heading off/back to college in the fall, I shall now present you with the easiest meal I have ever made. Even easier than mac and cheese from the blue box. No measuring involved!

Caprese Pasta

First, go to Trader Joe's.  This store is not replaceable, and I feel bad for those of you without it.  Wegmans, Harris Teeter, even Whole Foods will cause you to do more work than is necessary.  Feel free to grab a shot of coffee and whatever is on the hot plate to give you the energy to go on.
At Trader Joe's purchase the following:
-bag of orecchiette pasta
-jar of sun dried tomatoes in oil
-tub of mini mozzarella balls
-fresh basil
-tub of garlic and herb butter spread
-if you don't have dessert already, go choose something from the freezer case, I suggest something with chocolate (avoid the cheesecake), especially if you are making this to impress a girl
-Those 21+ : favorite bottle of red, or white, or beer
-Those trying to impress a girl: add a plant to your basket, cause I doubt you have a proper vase, and you can bring it home to your mother next time you drive home

The cooking begins.  You will need a pot to boil the water, a large bowl (mixing bowl works fine), your george forman, a knife, aluminum foil (makes clean up much easier), and a spatula or large spoon.

-Plug in the grill.  Fill the pot with water.  
-While the water is boiling, cut the baguette piece that fit in the grill and then split in the center.  Put the garlic butter on here in an amount that you believe will be sufficient, i suggest one tub per loaf, but some may see this as excessive...  
-Put the loaf back together, wrap in foil, put on grill, close lid as if this were a panini or grilled cheese.
-Your water should be boiling now, throw in some salt, then the bag of pasta.  Twirl it around a little with the spoon/spatula and set your phone for whatever the cooking time is.
-At this point, put the plant on the table, open the beverage of your choice, put silverware on the table.
-Open the sun dried tomatoes.  Dump the entire thing into the bowl.
-Open the mozzarella.  Drain off the oil/water and dump into the bowl.
-Now the hardest part: Grab a handful of basil leaves from the container.  Roll the basil into a tube, as one might have seen an actor roll marijuana cigarette in a movie, or something.  Slice the basil with the knife widthwise, so that when you unroll the basil you have little strips.  Congratulations, you have just learned how to chiffonade.  You're knife skills are now up there with Anthony Bourdain.
-Your phone should be beeping  Drain the pasta, no colander? Just use the lid to hold the pasta back when you pour out the water. 
-Dump the drained pasta into the bowl. Mix the contents of the bowl with your spoon/spatula.
-Unplug you grill.  Take the bread off, unwrap, put it on a plate. Put on table.
-Put fancy basil on pasta, put on table.
-Accept praise from your dinner companion.